Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Adventures in Babysitting - AKA Granny Lu Fail!

Today started off with promise. I met some of my boot-ies from butt camp for pancakes (we have to carbo-load before the next session begins on Monday). The rest of the day was running errands, picking and taking clothes to the cleaners, shopping at Wal-Mart, picking up pictures, mailing packages, and getting my filthy car cleaned (which after three pass-bys at my usual car cleaning establishment and finding it closed, I decided to run it through a self-cleaner).

Anyhoo, I had gotten quite a few things done, when it was time to pick up Lindley from day care. The plan was to pick her up, take her to my house for a snack, then prepare a meal for the whole family. So much for my plans. Here's what actually happened:

I punched in my code for the day care, allowing the lady behind me to also come in (of course, I'm hoping she's not some crazy whack job who has been trying to sneak into the day care all day to abduct innocent children and of course succeeds on my watch). I guess she was okay, because she went into another room and I signed Lindley out. I then went into Infant Room Whatever-The-Number-Lindley-Is-In to retrieve Lindley. Of course, I had to chat with Miss Gail about how wonderful Lindley is, and did she crawl for them today, and how smart and spectacular Lindley is. I remembered to get the leftover bottle from the refrigerator and Lindley's report card for the day. I stuffed all of this into the diaper bag, hoisted Lindley on hip, made some parting remarks about how great Lindley is, went through the security door (no code needed to get outside), and headed to the car.

The minute I looked at the car, I realized it - I had no car seat in my car. In my zeal to clean my car, I had removed said car seat. So, now I had a baby but no baby safety seat. I was in a pickle. There were several preliminary thoughts - could I strap Lindley into several seatbelts for the brief ride home (rejected because I felt sure I would be stopped by the police). Could I McGuyver a car seat out of the Wal-Mart purchases in my trunk (rejected because all I had was a Rubbermaid container and some soap). Could I go back into day care to see if they had a spare car seat (rejected because my name would not only be taken off the "pickup list" but probably be put on another "bad" list).

The thing I was going to have to do was obvious - call the parents, both of whom worked in the same city where the day care was located. However, both have jobs that involve meeting with people, and I didn't know which people they were meeting with and when, so I was pretty sure I was going to catch them either in a conference call or meeting with Al Gore or Charles Manson.

So first I texted Lynnette. She has 10 minutes to spare, so I call and give her the story. She could drive to meet me if needed. I decided to call Sam, who was meeting with some teenagers and couldn't leave them. However, he suggested that I check Lindley back into day care and go and get the car seat, which I figured would put me off the pickup list, on the bad list, and possibly warrant a Vandy psych unit pickup. Steve was on the golf course 30 minutes away and Molly was at work which was about 20 minutes away. I considered calling a cab, but figured they wouldn't have a car seat, either.

So, I made the decision to walk to Lynnette's work, get her car (which has a car seat in it) and drive home. Lynnette's and my car's fate would have to be decided later. So, I called Lynnette and told her of my decision. Now we had to decide how I was going to get Lynnette's car keys and where I would find her car. Lynnette said she would move the car and leave the car in a place to be texted to me later. Oh, and her work is .8 miles from where Lindley and I are.

So, Lindley and I set off for Lynnette's office and car. By the way, Lindley weighs at least 21 pounds, we think - we will officially know tomorrow at her 9-month doctor visit. We are a lovely sight - fat, old granny and healthy baby. We are tooling down the sidewalk and I am shifting Lindley from one side to the next. Of course, I also think I should sing - although I'm not sure if it's for my benefit or Lindley's. We pass the Vanderbilt employee smoking section, which is next to the traffic lane, so I guess if your lungs have to be toxic, you can just have your choice.

Anyhow, of course, it starts to sprinkle rain. I'm thinking, "Great - baby pneumonia." I'm not that worried, because we're about to pass a CVS drug store. I'll just pop in and buy an umbrella. Oh wait - I don't have my wallet. It's in the car with the diaper bag, the extra bottle, an umbrella, first-aid kit, snow tires, emergency hazard lights, a Rubbermaid container, and soap - BUT NO FREAKIN' CAR SEAT!!! So, we just trudge along, singing.

Lynnette had said that when I got to the Mellow Mushroom, I could probably see the car because it was facing 21st Avenue. When we got to Mellow Mushroom, I looked, but I didn't see the car. I began to wonder what car she had - had they gotten a new car? So we went up the street toward her office, and then I decided to turn left into the parking lot that was directly in front of Mellow Mushroom. Alas, there was no car there, but lots of signs signifying that this was a VERY RESTRICTED parking lot. What if her car had gotten towed?

We turned back around at Mellow Mushroom (which by this point, I would have appreciated smoking some mellow mushrooms), and went back up the street, where, of course, we saw the car - right where I turned left to go into the other parking lot.

Anyhow, we got in the car and went home. Just in time to pick up Steve so I could take him to my car so he could drive it home while we followed him. We got back to the house and since Lindley was asleep in her CAR SEAT, I decided I would head back to Vanderbilt to pick up Lynnette, who texted me that she was ready when I was half-way there. I then spent the next year in traffic, and finally got home two hours after picking Lindley up from day care.

We did have dinner - hamburgers and salad - although it wasn't quite the dinner I had in mind. And I guess all's well that ends well. As I told Lynnette - at least I had my blog post for tonight!!
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Today's blessings: Pancake Pantry with my boot-ies; getting lots of errands run and tasks completed; packages mailed; car cleaned; Lindley adventure

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